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February 21, 2013

Knoxville Pirate Fest canceled due to citywide ban on murder, hostage taking

Knoxville's first annual "Pirate Festival" capsized Wednesday due to a citywide ban on murder, hostage taking, looting and pillaging. Piracy enthusiast and riverboat captain Big Orange Beard has been planning to hold an authentic pirate-themed festival at Volunteer Landing for months. The event was to feature vessel hijacking, kidnapping, robbery, sword fighting and real time cannon battles. Organizers said the festival ran into trouble when police informed them that such activities are against the law. "I spoke with the police department to see if there would be any problems with sabotage resulting in the sinking of ships or with brutal sword murders," Orange Beard said. "Apparently that's not allowed in Knoxville. Neither is extortion, taking hostages, deliberately running ships aground or burning people alive." Orange Beard said plans for the festival are on hold unless the city grants an exception to these rules. "We may also try to see if there is a different location we can host the festival where these things are allowed," said Orange Beard. "Maybe Memphis or Chicago or Clinton, somewhere like that."

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