August 23, 2012
Knoxville panel OKs $250K to lure hipsters to Market Street
On a first reading Tuesday, Knoxville City Council approved putting $250,000 toward a grant to help developers bring hipsters to downtown. A publicly traded retail company plans to open a store at the Arnstein Building at 501 Market Street in the spring of 2013 catering to ironic people who refuse to shower and wear big framed glasses. The store is expected to carry 90s sitcom tees, moustache wall clocks and metrosexuality. "I'm really excited, in a completely disinterested way," said hipster Mason Foss. "I've been looking for a place to buy jeans that cost $5,000 to fit my little toothpick legs. Maybe they'll also have scarves that look like moustaches that are highly regarded by Pitchfork." "I thought hipsters shopped at thrift stores," said a man who will not be cool enough to shop with the Market Street hipsters. "I'm so confused."
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